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anatomy of a high school valedictorian

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At your high school graduation you pause on the podium,

valedictorian of your senior class, the lights encircling your hair

in golden gossamer. You do not know what to say here,

in this silence, between the pitfalls and the footsteps, the single mothers

with their three-year-old daughters shrieking in the back of the room.

Over 300 anxious faces stare out at you, the sweet bitter taste

of sweat pouring from so many bodies packed together

like icebergs drifting on the open sea.

There will be a time and place for everything,

but never a time to say This year I learned I was not invincible,

or to tell the tale of how a freshman girl scrawled

the words This is a tragedy, clear and proud

on the back of the bathroom stall door,

and you replaced it with But all love stories are.

So many milk cartons have been opened for this,

so many pop quizzes taken and failed, so many

teachers who doubted your worth

only because you raised your hand an average

of once a year.

Everything leads up to this moment, to the hushed atmosphere

of the room, so quiet a moth could land twice, three times

and every touch of its feet on the ground

could be heard clear as a bell.

You need to tell everyone in this crowd, daughters and friends

and brothers and lovers, all the teachers and student teachers,

that you will miss them, no matter what happened between you.

But you cannot fathom the words.

So instead, you settle on

I’ll see you soon.


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